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Everything You Need to Know About Divorcing with Kids in Illinois

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Everything You Need to Know About Divorcing with Kids in Illinois

Divorcing with Kids in Illinois

In many divorce cases, children are a factor that must be considered by both spouses. The thought of adding kids to the already emotional and complicated divorce process can lead many parents to remain in their marriage for years longer than they would have liked. Parents may firmly believe that staying with their spouse is what is best for their children, but in some cases, this idea can become an excuse that is used to avoid jumping into the uncertainty of unmarried life.

With over 25 years of combined experience working with divorcing parents, our DuPage County divorce attorneys have compiled a list of considerations that divorcing couples with kids can reference throughout the legal process. The legal and emotional intricacies that come along with divorce make it critical to be prepared for the effect that divorce can have on your kids and your family.

Telling Your Kids About Your Decision

First things first, parents who have made the definitive decision to file for divorce should inform their kids about their choice from the get-go. While it can be easy to do, it is never a good idea to put off this dreaded conversation. Your kids should hear about your divorce from you and your spouse, not from your nosy neighbor down the street or through their own assumptions. You may not know where to begin with the conversation, since you likely never planned on having it in the past. In order to have a successful and productive conversation, be sure to plan out your discussion with the following considerations in mind:

  • Be honest and open. You should never sugar-coat the specifics of this conversation with your children. Though you do not need to go into the nitty-gritty details of why your marriage is ending, you should be clear that you and your spouse are filing for divorce and that the decision is permanent. If you present your children with long-winded, convoluted explanations, they may be confused about what is happening and what they can expect in the future. If they ask why your marriage is ending, provide them with an honest, age-appropriate explanation while avoiding condemnations that may affect their future relationship with you and your spouse.
  • Don’t forget “I love you.” Though it may seem obvious to you, it is important that you stress that your decision to divorce is not a reflection of your love for your children. Some kids will assume that they somehow played a part in the end of your marriage, or they may think that your divorce will change your dedication to them as a parent. Remind your children that you love them and that your divorce, or anything else, will not change that.
  • Present a united front. Even though your marriage may be ending, your relationship as parents will continue into the future. It is imperative that you and your spouse be a team when it comes to your children. You should plan the conversation that you will be having with your children together so that you are both on the same page on how things should be handled. This will also help calm your kids by showing that you are both still their parents, even if you are ending your romantic relationship.
  • Be open to talking. Your children may have questions right off the bat, or they may come up with questions in the near future. Regardless, you should tell them that you are here to talk if need be. Never force your kids to talk or tell you their feelings before they are ready. They may take time to formulate their thoughts and feelings about your decision.

Legal Details

As you already know, you will need to make additional decisions in your divorce agreement if you and your spouse have children together. If you are using divorce mediation or are involved in a collaborative divorce, you and your spouse will be able to work together to make these decisions. However, if you are turning towards litigation for the resolution of your divorce, a judge will be in charge of making these decisions for you. The following areas will need to be outlined in what is known as a parenting plan or parenting agreement, either by you and your spouse or with the help of a family court judge:

  1. Child Custody and Parental Responsibilities:

These two areas really go hand-in-hand as you decide what responsibilities each parent will have. The parent that the child will live with the majority of the time is known as the custodial parent, while the other parent is known as the non-custodial parent. You and your spouse will need to determine who best fits as the custodial parent and what your parenting schedule will look like. Some choose to parent the kids on a bi-weekly basis, while others may break up their time with the kids on a daily basis. No matter your decision, it must be made in the best interests of the children. You will also need to list the legal rights granted to both parents, such as making medical decisions and having access to their confidential information.

  1. Child Support:

Unless your parenting schedule is split 50/50, with each parent spending an equal amount of time with your kids, one parent will usually owe the other financial support. The state of Illinois uses a specific method to calculate the proper child support amount owed by the non-custodial parent. This calculation considers each parent’s income, the number of children that the parents have, the time children will spend with each parent and more. Child support will be paid to the custodial parent until the children reach the age of 18. If either parent’s financial circumstances change, the amount of child support can be modified by the court.

  1. Relocating and Other Changes:

It is unrealistic to expect both parents to continue living in close proximity to each other for the remainder of their lives. One spouse may get a new job in a different state, or one parent may wish to start over somewhere else. For divorced parents, it is not as easy as packing all your belongings and finding a new place to live. If you are the primary parent of your children, you will need to gain legal permission from your co-parent or the court if you intend on relocating. The non-custodial parent does not have to make this same request, though you and your co-parent may need to alter the details of your parenting plan. If you intend on relocating or would like to make modifications to your agreement, you will need to discuss it with your attorney and receive permission from the court.

As you can see, there are a number of unique considerations that must be made if you are a parent filing for divorce. Despite the changes that divorce can bring to a child’s life, prioritizing your happiness in your relationship has actually proven to benefit children more than staying in an unhappy marriage. You not only become a model for your children’s future relationships, but you also show your strength as a parent. If you are a parent filing for divorce, allow a Naperville divorce lawyer to assist you with the legal details so you can focus on your family’s recovery.

Bio:

Attorney Sean P. Sullivan has over 10 years of experience in the fields of family law and business law. He and the DuPage County divorce attorneys of SBK Law Group provide dedicated representation for clients, helping them resolve highly contested disputes and find effective solutions to their legal issues.

Source:

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/parenting-family/children-and-divorce.htm

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Which flowers should I buy for mother’s day?

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Which flowers should I buy for mother’s day

Moms are awesome. She is your support system, your best friend, and is always there to give you a hug to make your day better. So when Mother’s Day comes around, there’s no better opportunity to show you value her love and care than with a flower delivery that will make her glow!

Choosing the perfect bouquet is actually quite simple. And with the ability to order and deliver online, you don’t have to worry about making time to run to the grocery store (where selection is limited and often lower quality) or running to the local florist in town. Here we will list our top flower delivery picks for Mother’s Day to help get you started with some ideas.

1. Classic roses

You can’t go wrong with a classic bouquet of fresh roses! Red roses signify love and romance but you can also go with pink, yellow, or even peach, which evoke sensations of joy and gratitude. Roses are so beautiful and delicate, your mother won’t be able to hide the look of joy when she sees a bouquet just for her!

2. Carnations

Carnations come in a variety of colors and are one of the longer-lasting varieties of flowers. These blooms will capture the attention of the mother in your life, expressing admiration and distinction. For a bouquet that acknowledges how special your mother is to you, carnations are a perfect pick.

3. Tulips

This beautiful spring bloom is widely known and comes in over 3,000 unique varieties. Tulips have been celebrated by different cultures around the world, inspiring many festivals with the tulip at the heart. They are a classic flower well-suited to be gifted to someone to whom you have unconditional love – like your mother!

4. Peony

Peonies are a large type of flower with a delightful scent. Peonies have a history of being imperial flowers, conjuring ideas of royalty and grace. They also have a history of being used in ancient medicinal practices. The connotations of elegance and healing work so well for mother’s day and are perfect for making a statement.

5. Lilies

Lilies come in sweet and beautiful blooms of pink, purple, white, yellow, and other varieties. The delicate petals are full of colorful dimensions which makes them such an awe-inspiring delight to look at. Select a bouquet with a mix of these colors for an unforgettable gift that stands apart from the rest!

No matter which style of arrangement you choose, flowers are a versatile gift that is sure to make the mother, grandmother, or another special woman in your life see how much you truly care about them. A bouquet can express the love and gratitude you feel for your mother and no one makes selecting and delivering the freshest bouquets to your loved one easier than Bloomex. Pick the arrangement you want to send by type of flower or occasion, or as a gift basket for an extra special touch.

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Buy Rakhi And Gifts As Per Zodiac Signs

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Buy Rakhi And Gifts As Per Zodiac Signs

No matter how many fights you fight, how many times your brother’s jokes annoy you, there is no day you do not pray for his happiness. But how often do you express your love? How often do you tell him clearly that he means the whole world to you? Choose the correct rakhi color and do rakhi online shopping according to his zodiac sign to make your sibling relationship stronger.

Aries

Aries always appreciates all the little things in life. His courage is something that cannot be broken. You can buy a new backpack or a pair of cool sunglasses or a new mobile phone or new sneakers for your next hike.

Taurus

People in this sign are ruled by Venus. The best Rakhi of the brother of this sun sign is the white Rakhi. Other Rakhi colors that can be considered for Taurus siblings are silver and blue. Wearing this Rakhi on the wrist will produce good results. The best Rakhi gifts for these zodiac brothers and sisters are flowers, chocolates, cashmere blankets, and plush pillows because they are outgoing and warm.

Gemini

Men are very smart, which is why you should give them a newspaper or a book. You must choose the green Rakhi. Give him something that can complement his intelligence, such as a book or diary or a unique picture frame.

Cancer

Buy rakhi made of silk or pearl thread because of their soft inside. Likewise, they like things that have personal meaning, so anything handmade or family-related will be the perfect gift for them.

Leo

Leo is a natural leader and deserves to be in a leading position. They work hard, are brave, attractive, and full of energy. Leo will never be too tired to try again before giving up. His works and characteristics inspire everyone around us. A personalized photo album or photo frame with all the good childhood memories, or a sumptuous dinner or painting, will be the perfect Rakhi gift for the Leo brothers.

Virgo

Rakhi made of silk thread or green or white should be your choice. Gifts for Virgo people are clocks, organizers, magazine baskets, ete. These are some gifts from Raksha Bandhan that you can consider.

Libra

For your Libra brother, choose purple or turquoise rakhi. Libra is a sign of balance and scale. They like beauty and sensuality, so a basket of soaps, lotions, and candles will be their ideal gifts.

Scorpio

Mars rules Scorpio. Therefore, it is best for sisters with Scorpion brothers to choose red or pink Rakhi. Your gift should include designer clothes or shoes or watches. Consider buying a red Rakhi for your Scorpio brothers and sisters.

Sagittarius

If your brother belongs to the Capricorn sun sign, it should be pink Rakhi. They are usually naturally ambitious, so you should give them something related to career and work.

Aquarius

Any dark rakhi will do wonders for a strong relationship with your brother. Any technical gadget will be the best gift for the brothers of this constellation.

Pisces

Pisces has a sensitive and caring mind. Therefore, a Pisces man is a good friend and listens carefully to other people’s problems. They also have an imaginative and intuitive mind. Books, paintings, music, flower arrangements, or anything that seems ingenious will become a very popular Rakhi gift for the Pisces brothers.

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Which Love Language Are You in the Bedroom?

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Which Love Language Are You in the Bedroom?

Dr. Gary Chapman’s New York Times Bestseller book entitled, The 5 Love Languages, explores the secret language of love that we all speak. By knowing you and your romantic partner’s love language, you can form a stronger bond that will endure for years to come in and out of the bedroom.

The love languages are defined as words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, receiving gifts, and physical touch. As unique human beings, we all respond differently to each of these languages.

Let’s examine each love language and ways we can use this knowledge to enrich our sex life.

Words of Affirmation
If you or your partner are receptive to words as your love language, then the best way to communicate your feelings and appreciation is through verbal communication. The preferred way to warm up things in the bedroom is to set the tone with sweet and encouraging words before taking action.

Granted, we aren’t all poets, so you might have to think a little bit about what you’re going to say to get your partner in the mood. Some people say that hearing the words, I love you, never gets old. That may be true, but it’s always a good idea to take your time and add some unique, heartfelt praise into the mix.

For example, if your partner has been working out, you could mention how strong and masculine he looks. Conversely, if she has purchased some new lingerie, you might want to compliment her on how beautiful she looks.

Quality Time
In a busy world where far too many of us have full schedules leaving very little time left over for our beloved, giving your partner quality time can be quite a challenge. But, for many of us, quality time is what we desire most. We want to share activities or just simple things like sipping a glass of wine in front of the fire before we are likely to get in the mood for sex.

What this means is that you must prioritize your partner. Put them on the schedule and make time for them. The keyword here is quality.

Don’t just think that you can get away with seeing them at the end of your day when you are exhausted and have little left to give, rolling into bed for a quickie. Have a nice dinner together. If you both like to cook together, then make that a special event each day so that you can reconnect and share your day, possibly as your version of foreplay that is consummated finally after you’ve relaxed and warmed up to each other.

Acts of Service
When you want your partner to ease your way through acts of service to show their love, then you want them to anticipate your needs and take initiative through action. When you walk through the door after a long day of work, it is truly nice to have your favorite drink prepared for you. Another way to show your love would be to finish up a chore that you know they will appreciate like fixing the loose handle on the pantry door or helping the kids with their homework so that you can relax.

While these actions might not sound like bedroom advice, they certainly pave the way for your beloved to relax and feel pampered enough to want to show their appreciation in the bedroom. This love language makes their desires and needs the central focus. Make dinner reservations at their favorite restaurant or spa for the weekend.

It’s amazing how loving we all feel when we feel like our partner knows us well and shows us through action. In the bedroom, consider offering your partner a night of their dreams that centers around their particular tastes without any ulterior motive.

Receiving Gifts
Some people say you can’t buy love, but you may be able to put down a healthy deposit on some prime-time loving in the bedroom by offering up thoughtful tokens to your beloved. Granted, you don’t want to trigger a Pavlovian response from your partner by offering them a gift every time you’re in the mood for love. Try some simple expressions like sweet love notes and the occasional gift of flowers or his favorite flavor of ice cream to show you care.

Remember, it’s all about the surprise and the thoughtfulness. Be sure that you buy something you know they will love. Show that you listen when they admire something in a store or on a TV commercial. The fact that you want to please them means everything to people who speak this language of love.

Sexy lingerie and vibrator sex toys to spice up life in the bedroom is not out of the question. Just remember that all your gifts should not be so obvious.

Physical Touch
When we think of sex, our mind immediately turns to physical touch. If that is your love language, then touch is very important to you. It’s not simply foreplay, but a way to show you care all the time.

If your partner expresses their affection through touch, then notice the difference between physical contact that leads to sex and affectionate hugs and daily touch that is less about sex and more about a loving gesture to show they care. It is important to read your partner and understand their particular language of love. Observation is key.

When marriage therapists say that good communication is key for a healthy marriage, they are giving us the keys to the kingdom. While we do not all speak only one language of love, we tend to favor one or two languages of love over others. Paying attention and learning which language your partner speaks will make all the difference.

Since our actions in the bedroom are connected to the overall health of our relationship, learning our partner’s love language is sure to improve your romantic life.

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